Posted by: TomA | 14 July 2008

Azerı Sıtuatıon

Bugger ıt.  We’ll get there and brıbe our way through. The lovely chap at the Azerı Embassy ın London poınted out ıt should be fıne – so here we come corruptıon…..


  1. First, be polite at border… speak a little Azerbaijani:
    (w’s are like cross between ee and wii)
    Hello = Salam / Salam ëlëyküm (a as in father, ë like the a in bad)
    Nice to meet you = chox shadam
    Good morning = sabahwnwz cheyir (ch like scottish loch, i as in pit)
    Good afternoon = gün aydwn, Salam (ü is between ee and oo)
    Good evening = achshamwnwz cheywr (ch like scottish loch X 2)
    Can you speak english = eengilisdze danwshwnwz?

    chox sagh awlun – (aw like awesome)

    If challenged about RHD vehicles, point out that Azerbaijan is a member of Vienna Convention on Road traffic which allows RHD vehicles, which states “The vehicle must meet all technical requirements to be legal for road use in the country of registration. Any conflicting technical requirements (e.g. right-hand-drive or left-hand-drive) in the signatory country where the vehicle is being driven do not apply.”
    (i don’t know that in azerbaijani)

    If that doesn’t work, pay bribe.

  2. . . and please can I have an MP3 file of you lot chatting to the border guards using Monkey’s script.

    Other phrases you might have needed include:
    – my what a nice rifle you have, what’s the range?
    – would you mind waiting a few hours while we pop back a couple of countries to get my camera?
    – Here, take a tube of Lovehearts for your girlfriend, she’ll be so excited you’ll be able to try anything.

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